Teacher Jokes

Teacher: "Sam, what is the outside of a tree called?"Sam: "I don’t know."Teacher: "Bark, Sam, bark."Sam: "Bow, wow, wow!"------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic to one little boy. So she said, "if you reached in your right pocket and found a nickel, and you reached in your left pocket and found another one, what would you have?""Somebody else's pants."------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?Paddy: Seven!Teacher: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?Paddy: Seven!Teacher: Let's try this another way. If I give you two apples and two apples and another two apples, how many apples have you got?Paddy: Six.Teacher: Good. Now if I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?Paddy: Seven!Teacher: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits is seven?Paddy: I've already got one rabbit at home now!------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----The teacher brings a statue of Venus into class and asks, "What do you like best about it, class? Let's start with you, Robert.""The artwork," says Robert."Very good. And you, Peter?""Her tits!" says Peter."Peter, get out! Go stand in the hall," responds the teacher with disgust. "And you, Johnny?""I'm leaving, teacher, I'm leaving..."------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----"Isn't the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl."Say, do you know who I am?" asked the girl."No.""I'm the principal's daughter.""And do you know who I am?" asked the boy."No," she replied."Thank goodness!"